Why boarding schools must do more to tackle child-on-child sexual abuse

Benji* was in his early teens when a fellow pupil at one of the country’s most prestigious independent schools began a series of sexual assaults against him that went on for years.

He had previously been happy at school, where he excelled at sport. Then one night he woke in his dormitory to find the other boy’s hand on his penis. “I just froze,” said Benji.

The boy threatened to beat him up if he reported what had happened, and the abuse began to accelerate. He would forcibly masturbate Benji three or four times a week. From there he began to force Benji to engage in fellatio every two to three days.

“It slowly got worse and worse,” said Benji. “He said he would beat the shit out of me. He claimed he had taken pictures of me when I was sleeping. He said he would put them up around the school and make this rumour up that I was gay.”

Awareness and safeguarding have improved significantly in UK boarding schools after decades of shameful revelations about sexual abuse, but experts say children who live and learn in institutions away from their parents will always be more vulnerable.

In the past, the focus has been on the appalling experiences of pupils who have been sexually abused by their teachers. Today, attention has also turned to the sexual violence perpetrated by one pupil on another – in boarding schools, as in other schools.

Earlier this month, a Guardian investigation uncovered the horrifying scale of child-on-child sexual abuse in schools, with at least 1,700 sexual offences against under-13s, including multiple rapes, reported to police every year.

It was not until more than a decade later that Benji felt able to disclose what he had suffered. “I was not in a place where I wanted to let out what happened to me. I was massively ashamed.” He abused alcohol and drugs and tried to kill himself. “I would do anything to blank it out. I was angry with the world.”

After leaving school, he went abroad where he began to do seasonal work. “Until I was 26, I was running away from the darkness. I did not want to deal with it. I didn’t want to have to think or relive it.”

After spiralling downwards, Benji finally told his mother. Horrified, she contacted the school. The police became involved, there was a trial and in September 2021 the perpetrator, Christopher Brewer, was convicted of 12 offences against Benji and one other pupil.

Jailing Brewer for three years, the recorder of Bristol, Judge Peter Blair, said Brewer had “ruined” Benji’s life. “He felt a complete sense of powerlessness. This was not a very long way away from sex slave.”

“I look back on that court case and that’s the proudest moment of my life,” Benji told the Guardian. “It’s the only time in my life when I’ve felt powerful. I had to do this for myself so I could move on, and could slowly become happier.”

Following the criminal case, Benji pursued a civil negligence claim against the school. The school denied liability, and a compensation settlement was finally agreed. Now he feels compelled to speak up to support others.

“If I can make a change to someone who is dealing with a similar situation, if I could change someone’s life for the better, it would make everything that happened worth it.”

Andrew Lord, a partner in the abuse claims team at Leigh Day, represented Benji in his civil action. “I have advised several families whose children have been impacted by abuse in boarding schools, and a great number describe still feeling the impact many years later.

“It is no longer credible for any school to plead ignorance on the shocking prevalence of sexual violence among pupils, nor is it acceptable to not have an immediate plan to investigate and mitigate these potential harms.

“There has been a growing awareness of these issues for several years, and the idiosyncrasies of a boarding school setting can create additional flashpoints of concern. Schools ought to be aware and prepared for when a disclosure of abuse occurs.”

Richard Scorer, who is head of abuse law at Slater & Gordon, said from his experience a “disproportionate” number of civil claims over child-on-child sexual abuse involve boarding schools. “Because, obviously, children are there more of the time and in circumstances where they might be dressing or undressing.

“They’re living not just a school life, but their private lives as well. So there’s probably a bit more coming from boarding schools in terms of what we see.” Wealthier families may also be more likely to seek legal redress.

Sam*, also represented by Lord, was a pupil at another renowned boarding school when an older student from a nearby dormitory got into his bed and sexually abused him. There were other incidents.

Sam did not report the abuse immediately. He felt too embarrassed, and in the months that followed, he lived in a state of terror. “I could hear his door open. I was frozen in fear.”

Eventually, Sam confided in a fellow pupil; it was reported to the housemaster, and he was asked to give a written statement. Yet, much to Sam’s alarm, in the days after disclosure, the boy was allowed to stay in the dormitory opposite.

The incident was finally reported to the police by Sam’s family, but there were no charges. “Ultimately I think the school did not want any bad press,” said Sam. But the abuse had a devastating and lasting impact on Sam.

Though he managed to secure a place at university, he had a “terrible” time. He hid in his room and left without completing his degree. “I think the assault and the aftermath did really change me.

“What I really feel I lost was confidence. I lost confidence in the school, which was in a position of care and responsibility. And I lost my own self-confidence to do anything.” Sam brought a civil action against the school, claiming negligence and safeguarding failures. The school denied liability and a settlement was reached.

Gabrielle Shaw, chief executive of the National Association for People Abused in Childhood (Napac), said awareness and safeguarding have improved, and there is greater recognition that children can be sexually abused by other children.

“But policies alone do not keep children safe. Boarding schools have an especially high duty of care because children live as well as learn there and may be separated from trusted adults outside the institution.

“Every pupil needs a safe route to speak out and a response that takes them seriously, protects and supports them, and acts appropriately. Crucially, it must be without reputation or institutional interests taking precedence.

“Children in boarding schools are not inevitably vulnerable to abuse. The real test is whether they trust adults enough to tell them, and what those adults do next.”

Robin Fletcher, chief executive of the Boarding Schools’ Association (BSA), said safeguarding young people is the top priority of every boarding school. “Over the past decade, BSA has worked to strengthen schools’ ability to recognise and respond to abuse through specialist training, conferences and safeguarding guidance.

“That work addresses child-on-child abuse as well as abuse by adults, helping staff identify concerns and respond appropriately rather than waiting for a child to make a disclosure.

“Any safeguarding incident reinforces the need for strong processes, training, support and a culture where abuse and abusers have no place in any school.”