Dancing with the Stars season 35 recap: Thank Maura Higgins, the women saved the season

If last night’s Dancing with the Stars season 35 premiere episode led to me feeling filled with dread about the upcoming season, the women joining the competition really calmed all of my fears. The eight ladies performed their debut dances with enough personality to make up for what was missing on Tuesday night.

After sitting with the men’s performances for 24 hours, I felt a certain likability missing from most of them. Ezra Frech’s great performance and energy aside, the rest of the cast was completely forgetful. (Did you know Tyler Cameron is a contestant this season? And he’s dancing with Sharna Burgess?! Who knew!)

Luckily, from the moment the pre-taped package began for Tatyana Ali, I knew this episode would make up for lost time.

The biggest tell was the difference in the judges’ critiques from night one to night two. Last night was filled with “You were so happy out there!” while tonight was filled with actionable critiques because they see a passion for growth in these stars’ eyes. 

It was a true delight seeing these women take to the floor with a palpable vigor for the competition and for tackling these performances head on. Even looking at the lower-scoring couples, I still want them around because of their effervescence and genuine excitement for what’s to come. 

For example, Giada De Laurentiis (paired with human Golden Doodle Alan Bersten) has clearly never put on a dancing shoe in her life. Hell, she probably listens to “Sneaknight” by Vanessa Hudgens and thinks it’s about a sensible Skechers Shape-Up. Yet her tears flowed once her dance finished. She felt pride in climbing this seemingly unreachable mountain of dance, and reader, she wasn’t horrendous! It wasn’t like when Carrie Ann looked at Guillermo last night and went, “You’re fun!”

Same goes for the aforementioned Tatyana Ali, who acquired the worst scores of the night after messing up quite a few times during her Jive, still performed with a sense of purpose in the ballroom.

Isn’t that all we ask for as viewers? For these couples to care? That’s why Andy Richter stuck around for so long, because he truly cared—a fate I don’t think will befit the oft compared Guillermo (unless Witney doesn’t take a crowbar to his shins first).

One could argue only two couples produced “iffy” performances, with the rest providing decent week one scores and fun numbers.

Amber Glenn is following a long line of successful figure skating champions on the show (with Meryl Davis remaining the greatest winner in the show’s history), but still held her own with a sexy cha cha.

Jenna Dewan comes in with a lot of dance experience (she played Step in Step Up and she gave everything), but managed a powerful (if not frantic) tango that left the judges excited.

Ciara Miller is bringing in buckets of emotional baggage from her last year as the victim of infidelity, but managed a strong core understanding of how one should perform in the ballroom. All three? Personality for days!

My top two of the night were Julia Stiles (!!) and Maura Higgins (?!), both showing up and showing out. Julia Stiles and Ezra Sosa are a tremendous pairing, and from the moment they met, have had a chemistry that cannot be taught. They seem like genuine, immediate friends, which is always a delight to watch on this kind of show.

And her comedic quickstep was so goddamn fun to watch. Whatever happened to fun?! Carrie Ann gave an excellent critique about Julia’s hold (making sure to extend, not lean), which is a telltale sign that Carrie Ann thinks she can go far. 

Maura Higgins, however, was the surprise of the night. A celebrity with absolutely no performing experience (other than putting a satanic spell on Rob Rausch to acquire a Birkin bag) is rarely in the upper echelon of scores on Dancing with the Stars, especially on the first night, but my god she tore.

The effortless gliding during the foxtrot, her lines were strong and fluid…she has made a name for herself in this competition. I just yearn for Mark Ballas to not choreograph her some over-the-top bullshit. (“All right, so for this week’s Argentine Tango, we’re going to recreate the horror film Leprechaun 2, but you’re not going to be a tiny Irishman, you’ll instead be playing Ed Sheeran not supporting Macklemore’s pro-Palestine comments.”)

All in all, the episode was a lovely dessert after yesterday’s subpar entrée. Guess Rachel Bloom was right, it is fun to generalize about men!

(I’m sorry, I’m looking at my notes and it seems that walking sheet of 8×11½ copy paper, Sarah Jane Nader, performed a Jive with her female partner. No, I feel like I would’ve remembered that.)

(Oops, I’m reading further and it seems that she went home tonight. Alright then, no harm no foul!)

Some stray sequins:

• Does anyone else feel that Derek Hough uses his wife as a prop every season? Like, Look, I married a professional ballroom dancer, but she’s too good for this show, so I get to show her off periodically throughout the season!
• Anyone else relieved to know that the official podcast is also sponsored by Paris Baguette?! Thank fucking god!
• The extended focus on the troupe this episode was lovely and a great extra showcase for their talent. Carter, I’ve grown to love you!
• Speaking of the troupe dance, they were one of two separate routines set to new music from Madonna’s “Confessions II” album. I sure screamed the f slur at the television in a supportive, uplifting way.
• There is a man with long hair who has danced in both opening numbers, yet has never been mentioned and is not a member of the troupe. Did he walk off the street? Is this community service? Who is this mystery man?!
• Ezra, what kind of food do you like? Lemme book us a dinner ressie somewhere!

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