Civilians are always landing planes in movies. Call me cynical, but I doubt I could wing it
Despite a lifetime of media convincing me otherwise, I will not be landing the plane.
You might recognise the scene from countless made-for-TV movies and more than a few made-for-the-movies movies: the pilot falls victim to a hijacker/terrorist/stomach bug and a hapless passenger is forced to take a crash course in commercial aviation (minus the actual crash).
An unexamined part of my brain had always assumed that when the proverbial stuff really hit the fan, I’d be able to step up and bring that bird down in one piece. It wouldn’t be a cakewalk, obviously, but if I wrestled the joystick with the requisite amount of grimacing, grunting and muttering, “Pull up, pull up, you pile of junk”, we’d all be on the tarmac and waving to reporters in time for a late supper.
Pop culture is littered with scenes in which people like you or me land the plane, but I think ... it might actually be a big deal? At the very least, it deserves a literature review.
The trope first took off big time with 1956’s Julie, in which Doris Day plays the flight attendant tasked with landing duties after her ex-husband shoots the pilot. The film was nominated for a couple of Oscars, and from there the idea of a civilian running the flight deck became a meme. The mega-hit disaster flick Airport 1975 had a small aircraft accidentally taking out the crew of a 747, forcing a stewardess (in the parlance of the day) to take the controls, while the subsequent parody Airplane! offered the aforementioned gastro as an excuse to put another normie at the wheel.
The civilian-at-the-controls trope reached its apex in the ’90s with the likes of Ray Liotta and Lauren Holly in Turbulence, and Kurt Russell and Halle Berry in Executive Decision. Even the 2006 horror-comedy Snakes on a Plane looks like Hitchcock compared with the dozens of cheapo knock-offs since, which were nobody’s choice of in-flight entertainment. If you find yourself faced with the likes of Air Force One Down, Flight 666 or Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal, initiate emergency protocols.
‘Social media boosts voices that declare their every opinion with absolute confidence.’
There are engineering-minded citizens who could probably fudge their way around an airliner’s controls, of course, and there have been instances such as the recent flydubai case, in which assistance from civilians allowed two off-duty pilots to pull the flight out of a dive.
But even figuring out my car’s rear demister can feel like Mission: Impossible wizardry sometimes. What kind of toxic mindset led me to believe I could wrangle 200 tonnes of metal at high altitude? As one commenter on a YouTube plane-landing video succinctly puts it, “I once thought I could bring a plane down safely. Now, I realise I wouldn’t even be able to turn on the radio.”
I could blame pop culture for delivering a biased depiction of everyday schmoes pulling off extraordinary feats. I can think of only one film in which ordinary folk actually fail to land the plane: United 93, a terrifying re-creation of the 9/11 flight in which passengers fought back against the terrorists who had taken over the cockpit (speaking from experience, this is not a film to watch the day before catching a plane).
But in our particular cultural moment, overestimating one’s ability to take on complex tasks seems less like hubris and more like the norm. Social media boosts voices that declare their every opinion with absolute confidence, while the political and business worlds are equally dominated by bloviating self-promoters apparently able to solve problems well outside their wheelhouse.
It’s one thing to presume that your opinion on any given subject is worth airing. It’s an exponential leap to look at the experience and training someone brings to a highly specialised field and think, “Reckon I could probably wing it.”
It’s the “my kid could paint that” ethos of applied ignorance extended to, you know, everything. Free solo Eureka Tower? I’d give it a crack. Win an election? Could if I wanted to.
It doesn’t feel like the healthiest default mental setting. The relentless pressure of No Limits doesn’t leave a lot of room to Know Thyself. In the age of influencers and hustle culture, “I’m not sure I could do that” is akin to a mayday signal.
Uncertainty is uncomfortable. It suggests you need to ask for assistance. While writing this, I’ve been watching videos explaining just how to land a plane, and the biggest takeaway is that you can’t do it on your own. Landing a plane is indeed a big deal, and the most useful skill to bring to such a disaster scenario is the ability to listen and take instruction from the professionals on the ground. That and working out how to turn on the radio.
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- Jeopardy!: In a time of global peril, a TV quiz show hosted by a Mormon brainiac can save us.
KioskNews shows a cleaned-up reading view extracted from the publisher’s page — the original always lives on their site, not ours.