Red flags to watch out for during holidays

By  Silas Mwirigi

Principal

Kagumo High School

As children settle into the long holiday, parents and guardians must recognise that their responsibility extends beyond providing food, entertainment and pocket money. With school routines suspended, children have greater freedom to determine how they spend their time, whom they associate with and what influences shape their decisions. While most will enjoy the break without incident, others may encounter pressures and temptations with lasting consequences. Will parents be attentive enough to notice when something is amiss?

One of the first areas requiring scrutiny is a child’s choice of friends. Has your son or daughter suddenly abandoned familiar friendships in favour of companions considerably older than themselves? Do these new associations involve markedly different interests, lifestyles or attitudes towards responsibility? Older acquaintances may expose children to alcohol, drugs, gambling or exploitative relationships. Parents should seek to understand these friendships without immediately condemning them, since an accusatory approach may drive a child further into secrecy. Equally telling is a noticeable deterioration in personal grooming and hygiene. Emotional distress, substance use or negative peer influence could be contributing factors. Rather than responding with ridicule or punishment, parents should establish what lies behind the change and whether the child needs support.

Another red flag is excessive secrecy about movements and digital interactions. Although adolescents naturally seek greater privacy, repeatedly lying about destinations, disappearing without permission or returning home late should not be dismissed lightly. Similarly, concealed online relationships, unexplained contact with much older individuals or gifts from unknown contacts may point to manipulation or exploitation. Parents must establish reasonable boundaries around movement and internet use while ensuring children can disclose uncomfortable experiences without fearing humiliation or disproportionate punishment.

Parents should also be alert to a growing preoccupation with drugs and alcohol. Persistent talk about obtaining substances, possession of cigarettes or vaping products, returning home intoxicated or spending time with peers who use drugs warrant serious attention. When these signs coincide with repeated requests for money or unexplained absences, the need for intervention becomes more pressing.

Nevertheless, it is important to distinguish genuine warning signs from the ordinary process of growing up. A new hairstyle, a different friendship or a desire for privacy should not, in isolation, provoke alarm. What matters is the context, the persistence of the change and whether several concerning behaviours emerge together.

These two months offer an opportunity to strengthen family relationships, reinforce sound judgment and address emerging concerns before they develop into crises. A parent who notices, asks and acts in time may prevent a temporary lapse in judgment from becoming a lasting consequence.

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Dr Mwirigi is a researcher, author, and Chief Principal, Kagumo High School. silas.mwirigi@gmail.com