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Wednesday, November 4, 2026

Jimmy Kimmel Celebrates Midterm Election ‘Blue Tsunami’: ‘Now the Red Wedding Begins’

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"Democrats took so many seats JD Vance can't even find one to have sex with him tonight"

Jimmy Kimmel recapped last night’s midterm election on Jimmy Kimmel Live, celebrating the wins for the Democrats and the losses for Donald Trump. Although not all of the results were called when the episode aired last night, Kimmel did declare it a blue wave victory.

“And not just a blue wave, a blue tsunami,” Kimmel noted. “One election model from Harvard said the chances of Republicans keeping the House tonight was as likely as rolling the number 20 on a 20-sided dice. They could have just said five percent, but somebody at Harvard really wanted to let us know they play Dungeons and Dragons.”

He added, “It seems to be after all the talk about Nicki Minaj’s ass, John Huad’s ass, the only ass on Trump’s mind tonight is the one that just got handed to him. Democrats took so many seats JD Vance can’t even find one to have sex with him tonight.”

Kimmel recounted how Trump was “reportedly angry and cursing as the results came in.” “It’s all looking good for Democrats,” he explained, noting a few key races, including James Talarico’s successful campaign in Texas. “Man, would I hate to be the DoorDash driver who delivers Trump his Papa John’s tonight.”

The host continued, “I’m sure Trump didn’t know the extent of it, but I have to believe he saw some of this coming because this morning he was bragging about his approval rating in another country.” He then played a clip of Trump claiming he has a 99 percent approval rating in Israel, adding that he could move there and become prime minister. “That might be the best idea he’s ever had,” Kimmel added. “I would gladly pay for an El Al flight. Make Israel great again. You could sell a whole new line of hats.”

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As the late-night show aired it was clear the Democrats would take the House (they went on to also take the Senate). “The blue wave has made landfall and now the red wedding begins,” Kimmel declared. “The bad news is I guess we’re not getting that $5,000.”

He concluded, “Donald Trump is officially a lame duck and an orange chicken at the same time.”

View the original on Rolling Stone →

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