Traitors New Blood premiere recap: baby players, traitor accomplices

NBC’s The Traitors: New Blood’s game of “strangers and equals” is definitely different than both the Peacock reality star version and the UK’s civilian version. But I’d describe it as a game of baby reality stars, which extends all the way to one of this season’s new twists: traitors-in-training.

By the end of two episodes, the traitors had some help from accomplices—but were the faithful or the recruited? No spoilers for that until the episode two section below, in case you haven’t yet seen both episodes. (NBC is airing two more episodes next Thursday, and then zero episodes on Oct. 1. And the episodes land on Peacock the next day, just like Bravo shows.)

Traitors New Blood episode 1: ‘A new dawn is rising’

Without the familiarity of being on a reality TV show, the cast is trying too hard or disappearing into the castle walls. And the first batch of Alan interview clips focusing on what the players would do with the money, which made the players seem more like a Food Network baking show cast.

Thankfully, that was contained to the first act—which was also jarring thanks to the hot garbage visual of a crow flying through the “Scottish Highlands.” Whether it was CGI or generative AI or animation, that cold open was shit. Just fly a drone around the castle! The drone shot of the sunken ship challenge location was far more spectacular than whatever the heck that opening was.

Ditto for the Weasley brothers showing up for one second. Is that why they fired poor Fergus, just for that worthless cameo from two guys who keep helping Joanne earn more blood money?

The adaptation to network TV didn’t dumb things down, thankfully, though Alan explained to new viewers that the traitors would “murder their fellow players”—but that was “metaphorically speaking, of course.” NBC doesn’t want a Whodunnit situation, I guess.

The players are new, and so is The Traitors’ game. Sort of. The producers have added “an extra incentive,” as Alan Cumming described it: $15,000 per banished traitor.

That’s a good way to encourage actually voting out traitors. But as long as they’ll continue to be replaced—and the faithful lack the Werewolf/Mafia roles that I can’t believe the format hasn’t added already—it’s still the traitors’ game.

Alan chose just two traitors at the first roundtable, and both were big personalities:

• Joe the funeral director
• Tomica the pilot

“If you see something, say something,” Joe told everyone, and then told us, “There are times that I need to shut up, and I need to recognize that in this game.” Joe wanted people “who won’t be too overbearing,” so not like himself, ha!

In the turret, they learned they’d pick two possible traitors, one of whom would become a traitor and the other would be murdered. But that didn’t arrive until the second episode.

A few player observations:

• Katie is worried about being overlooked for being the youngest, but when she said she was 23, I thought she meant inches because she disappears among this crowd of tall people, including…
• Ben, who described himself as both “a six-foot-three Sasquatch” and “gay best friend.” I’ve always wanted a gay Sasquatch bestie.
• Kim, a lawyer with her own criminal defense firm, told us “people think attorneys are dishonest, manipulative, deceitful,” so uses coach as a cover story—but wore what another player described as “a very lawyer-ly suit.”
• Niyyah, a therapist, said “I help people, and now I’m going to help myself—to everyone else’s money.” I was going to make a joke like Isn’t that what therapists do? HAHA HEALTHCARE COSTS. But therapists are worth all the money, and everyone should have one, and Jeff Bezos should pay for it. Yes, I am helping us all to his money.

The first mission offered $50,000 and three shields. Curiously, it was not designed with any kind of groups or teamwork—well, except for carrying heavy crates to the shore from a shipwreck that looked like Survivor 49’s Tribal Council set.

Instead of helping, Victor went for a shield immediately. Abby L. did later, surprising herself (“this game does things to you”), then Madeline (“I went about it in an honorable way” by waiting until the end).

The players finished with seconds to go—I just don’t trust The Traitors’ on-screen clock—and earned all $50,000. And then they waited to see who’d be murdered, and we waited to see who the traitors would recruit as accomplices.

Traitors New Blood episode 2: ‘I’m a sweaty boy’

The accomplices—Katie and Xavier—met each other in the forest, and then murdered the other traitors’ choice by chopping ropes and letting them float away in a coffin.

The traitors’ shortlist was Michael, Kim, and Arisa, and they went with Coach Kim, whose cover story failed her. “I’m scared of her,” Tomica said in the turret.

At breakfast, Victor suggested there was a murder and a seduction, while Madeline thought there was “a third adding a fourth.” Meanwhile, traitor Joe and accomplice Katie told us they both practiced their reactions. The Real Housewives would never! They already know how to lie to others’ faces!

Jay knows how to be invited back to future shows—and also win a game. “My plan for today” is to “lean into exactly who I am,” he told us, so he entered the breakfast room and set it ablaze with his gayness.

“They’re going smart,” Kriste said. But not Kriste; she played big and sloppy, and bless her heart for it!

Xavier also had a curious approach. He kept bringing up that “Alan mentioned that there was still going to be another traitor.” Then he twice IDed Katie—including to Tomica! So he’s going after another traitor before he’s even a traitor? Bad bad strategy. C’mon baby reality TV star accomplice traitor!

The players went directly from breakfast to the roundtable, but the producers gave them time in-between to fuck up their games.

Sitting in the staircase alcove thingy, Madeline said, “I’d feel like shit picking Kim.” That made Kriste think she’d admitted it. Kriste misheard—but she ran around the castle telling everyone anyway.

At the first roundtable, Victor got heat for going after the shield immediately, and then Kriste called out Madeline. “You said, I felt bad about picking Kim.”

“I did not say that,” Madeline said, and Victor said, “I did not hear that at all.” But Kriste was so confident and they were so blindsided they couldn’t defend themselves without sounding irrationally defensive, which really sucks for them. Hanging out with each other all the time also made them look even more suspicious.

Kriste declared, “I know what I heard,” and then pointed at Victor and shouted, “and Victor, it will come out! I knew that you were bald-face lying!” I was ready for her to smash her water glass on the table, pick up a shard, and scream, Who wants to play?!

Instead, she said, “We have ourselves two traitors. We have an opportunity to get a traitor out.” Victor was left defending himself with a new iconic line: “I’m a sweaty boy, guys.”

Votes went to Victor and Madeline. “I think you’re the hottest traitor I’ve ever met,” Michael said when voting for Victor. So now we know Michael’s type is sweaty straight guys who blow their games early.

The Traitors: New Blood has me hooked because Kriste ended up being a bigger accomplice for the traitors than either Katie or Xavier. That’s the fun of competition reality TV: the players can surprise you more than the game.

Since Victor survived the vote and was the only person to call out Kriste, I was expecting him to target her next episode. But he got right to that, smashing his glass on the table, picking up a shard—oh, sorry, still didn’t happen.

“Kriste’s a liar. I never said that. I’m a faithful,” Madeline declared as she exited the game, and that led to this incredible exchange:

Kriste: “I’m not a liar!”

Victor: “Yeah, but you’re not a good hear-er, either.”

ZINNNNNGGGG! Even though she wildly overreacted, I vastly prefer Kriste’s game to, say, Logan’s. He appeared more interested in the food than the game. “Dang that’s good,” he said, walking around eating after the editors made sure to show him standing in front of the food and commenting on it.

Meanwhile, dog groomer Arisa called Victor “a bad Chihuahua” and insisted she could read his dog energy, holding his hand and asking him if he’s a traitor or if he plans to be one by watching the new Harry Potter cash grab. Niyyah called the hand-holding “just weird.”

Accomplices Katie and Xavier had a task to do in plain sight, with the traitors watching them: retrieve one of two warrants. If one fails, that person was automatically murdered. If both succeed, then the traitors choose the traitor and who will exit the game.

The warrants were hidden in copies of the book Crime and Punishment, which were in the atrium and the library, both well-trafficked spaces. Xavier book-blocked Katie in the atrium. Katie got the book in the library but gave up.

And the swelling music told us no one would get anything before the episode ended. Yep: cue the moon. Okay, The Traitors: New Blood, I’m in—even with a Freeform/Netflix cliffhanger.

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