When raising children costs more than parents expect

Most parents expect raising a child to be expensive, but it is not always the big-ticket items that take them by surprise. School fees and tuition may be costs families brace themselves for, yet groceries, meals and everyday necessities can put just as much pressure on the household budget.

As children grow, those recurring expenses have a habit of growing with them. A recent parenting survey by fintech platform Versa found that 66% of parents were spending more on their children each month than they had expected, including 27% who said the amount was “much higher”.

Only 31% said their actual spending was close to what they had budgeted, while just 3% found themselves spending less.

Perhaps most tellingly, food and daily necessities were cited as a major monthly expense by 70% of respondents, almost level with education fees and tuition at 69%.

The figures suggest that the financial reality of parenthood is shaped not only by major commitments such as schooling, but by the steady accumulation of ordinary needs – meals, groceries, clothes, transport, and all the little things that rarely feel significant until they are added together.

When something has to give

For many families, spending more on their children means finding somewhere else to cut back. The survey found that reducing personal spending was the most common adjustment parents had made, cited by 30% of respondents.

Another 22% had scaled back lifestyle spending, while 16% postponed major purchases and 11% sought additional income. Only 9% said becoming a parent had not required any financial adjustment.

In practical terms, those compromises may mean fewer meals out, putting off a new phone or holiday, or simply becoming more careful about purchases that once required little thought.

These are often modest sacrifices individually, but together they reveal how family priorities shift once children enter the picture.

Yet even as day-to-day costs prove higher than expected, many parents are still trying to protect their children’s longer-term future. Some 78% of respondents said they already had savings or investments set aside specifically for their children, while most of those who had not started said they intended to do so.

There is something revealing in that contrast: even when today’s household budget is under pressure, saving for tomorrow remains difficult for many parents to abandon.

Before having children, it is tempting to think family finances can be neatly mapped out – childcare, education, healthcare, savings and perhaps the occasional family holiday.

In reality, children have a way of making spreadsheets look optimistic. They grow out of shoes and clothes, appetites change, school expenses appear, and unexpected medical or household costs can upset even a carefully planned month.

That does not necessarily mean parents underestimate the responsibility of having children. Rather, it shows how difficult it is to anticipate the cumulative cost of needs that evolve over many years.

The survey involved 677 parents among 2,565 Malaysians polled through an app, so its results should not be taken as representative of all Malaysian families.

Still, the findings reflect a dilemma that will feel familiar to many households: how to give children a good life today without neglecting what they may need tomorrow.

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