Pastors’ marital woes spark divorce debate

The recent remarriage of the Senior Pastor of The Fountain of Life Church, Jimmy Odukoya, has reignited controversy over divorce among pastors, with religious leaders expressing divergent views on the growing number of failed marriages involving prominent clerics.

Saturday PUNCH gathered that at least eight marriages involving prominent Nigerian pastors, including Chris Oyakhilome, Chris Okotie, Joshua Iginla and Olumide Emmanuel, ended in divorce or separation between 2012 and 2026.

In 2016, the divorce between Christ Embassy founder Oyakhilome and his wife, Anita, was finalised, while Household of God Church founder Okotie separated from his second wife, Stephanie, in 2012.

Similarly, the General Overseer of Champions Royal Assembly, Iginla, announced the breakdown of his marriage to Yemisi in 2020.

In 2023, Pastor Emmanuel also spoke publicly about the collapse of his first marriage.

Jimmy’s collapsed marriage and new bride

Findings by our correspondents showed that Jimmy married his first wife, Oluwakemi Banjoko, in March 2013 in London.

The couple have two children together, but the cause of their marriage breakdown remains unknown.

While introducing his new wife, Jimmy disclosed that his first marriage collapsed long before he assumed the role of senior pastor in 2023, following the death of his father, Taiwo Odukoya.

According to reports, the couple tied the knot in a private ceremony in the United States after an introduction in Lagos.

Born Motunrayo (Mo) Daniel, the new wife is a creative entrepreneur and designer, and the daughter of Reverend Theophilus and Bolaji Daniel.

She was previously married to a British-Nigerian gospel music producer and artist, Mosadoluwa Adegboye, popularly known as itsMOSA.

Church members raise eyebrows

A member of The Fountain of Life Church, who spoke to Saturday PUNCH on condition of anonymity, alleged that the relationship between Jimmy and his new wife, Mo, had been a subject of controversy among some people familiar with the family over the years.

The source alleged that Jimmy had been “involved” with Mo several years after the breakdown of his first marriage.

The source also claimed that Mo was previously a close friend of Jimmy’s elder sister, Pastor Toluwani Odukoya-Ijogun, popularly known as Tolu.

According to the source, the friendship between the two women ended after Tolu learnt of the relationship between her brother and Mo.

“I have also been curious to know who he eventually married because he was dating this Mo lady some years ago after his marriage ended. Mo was Tolu’s best friend. When Tolu got to know she was having a relationship with Jimmy, the friendship ended,” the source said.

The church member further alleged that the relationship generated controversy long before the couple’s marriage became public.

“No issues with divorcing and remarrying, but you see, the thing has been controversial for a long time. I knew her through Tolu,” the source stated.

The church member expressed concern that the alleged circumstances surrounding the relationship could create tension within the Odukoya family and the church.

The source also questioned the reactions of some church members during the couple’s public appearance, saying older members appeared less enthusiastic than younger worshippers.

Another church member, who spoke to our correspondent on Friday on condition of anonymity, said the introduction of the pastor’s new wife to the congregation on Sunday elicited mixed reactions.

According to the source, while some members were excited about the development, others, particularly some women, were disappointed.

The source said, “I don’t really know when his marriage ended because we never discussed it. He didn’t tell us, but some close relatives said his marriage ended before his father passed. His ex-wife was also present at the funeral to pay her last respect.

“The truth is that when we saw it on social media, there were mixed feelings. People who have worked closely with him were really excited, and they all testified that he is not a wayward person.

“However, some people were not excited. Since Pastor Jimmy came on board, we have had different kinds of people coming to the church, especially ladies. When you have been admiring someone and then discover that he is already taken, you will naturally feel somehow. Some people also felt he should have carried the church along.

“I don’t really buy into that kind of entitlement because we don’t know what ended his first marriage. The level of excitement I expected was not what I saw. His sister also welcomed her.”

Some comments posted beneath the wedding video on YouTube appeared to reflect different sentiments.

Checks by Saturday PUNCH on Tolu’s Instagram page on Friday showed no post congratulating or publicly acknowledging her brother’s marriage although she was present at the public presentation.

Her last post was a sermon video shared on Wednesday, accompanied by the message: “Obedience may cost you your comfort, but it will never cost you your future. God rewards obedience in ways disobedience can never afford.”

While her silence on social media does not establish that she opposes the marriage or that there is a disagreement between the siblings, it draws attention to the family dynamics surrounding the union.

Old videos of Jimmy, new wife with ex-spouses go viral

In an interview posted on X by TheOguns2 (@ogundamm2), conducted years ago to mark the 10th wedding anniversary of Mo and her ex-husband, Adegboye, she reflected on how they met, their decision to marry young and the experiences that shaped their early years together.

Adegboye recalled that they met at a friend’s house and got married when he was 23 and she was 21.

Mo said she was not afraid of getting married at a young age but was apprehensive about what to expect from life with her husband.

She said, “I didn’t really have any fears about living with him. It was just the apprehension of not knowing what to expect. Our first year, staying alone, we had a lot of fun.”

Adegboye also recalled how Mo sometimes struggled with his high libido, despite their decision to abstain from sex while dating.

Expressing his appreciation for her, he added, “Mo, I am very grateful to you. Thank you for balancing me in my excesses and improving me. I can’t think of a better mother for my children. Thank you for standing by me. I am very grateful for that. Another 10 decades to go.”

In a separate interview posted on X by Iyanuoluwa_Adebola, Jimmy recounted how he met his former wife, Banjoko, through her cousin, whom he had known from school.

He said the cousin returned to Nigeria for her introduction ceremony and invited him to meet her, an encounter that eventually brought him and Banjoko together.

His ex-wife said the first five years of their marriage were challenging because they lived in different countries, with her based in London and Jimmy in Nigeria.

Reflecting on that period, she said, “The first five years of the marriage, I would say, were unbalanced but pretty good, meaning that we had more good times than bad times. It wasn’t perfect; the first year was tough.

“I think in early marriage, you have to adjust and learn to live with somebody you have never lived with before. We had different ways of doing things. Being first-time parents was tough because of the distance. I was in London, and he was in Nigeria.”

Many users on X stated that the old videos might have provided a glimpse into the reasons for their marital challenges.

The Chairman of the Nigerian Bar Association, Ikirun branch, Abdulkareem Azeez, said divorce cases involving religious leaders were underreported.

According to him, the parties involved often preferred to settle amicably and go their separate ways rather than resort to litigation.

Azeez cited sexual incompatibility, noting that the resulting emotional and physical gaps could contribute to marital breakdown.

Ex-CAN president, church founder outline conditions

Speaking on the issue, a former President of the Christian Association of Nigeria, Rev. Samson Ayokunle, said the Bible permitted separation under certain circumstances but did not support divorce and remarriage.

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He said couples facing threats to their lives could separate but not remarry.

“The Bible doesn’t support divorce. What the Bible supports is separation. If it may involve their lives, they can separate, but they cannot remarry because marriage is for life. In Matthew 19, Jesus said it himself,” Ayokunle said.

The former President of the Nigerian Baptist Convention added that religious differences could also lead to separation, particularly where a spouse who was not a Christian could no longer cope with the other’s faith.

“Man or woman can do whatever they feel like, but the law of God does not change. God will not accept us at our own standard. We can work with God only at His own standard; otherwise, you will reap whatever you sow,” he said.

Similarly, the Founder of Christ Apostolic Church, Light of Joy, Ibadan, Evangelist Alaba Akande, identified adultery as the major biblical ground for divorce.

He said the provision applied to both men and women, adding that couples should remain together if neither partner had committed adultery.

“The major ground is adultery. When a woman is committing adultery and she is caught, she can be divorced. The same thing is applicable to the man. If there is no adultery, as a pastor, you have to live together forever and not divorce. You will just have to continue to maintain yourself,” Akande said.

Divorce is rebellion against God – Pastors

The founder of Help for the Family Ministry, Pastor Dayo St. John, a marriage counsellor, said marriage was established by God for a purpose, warning that breaking the marital covenant had consequences beyond the couple involved.

He described divorce among pastors as an act of rebellion against God, particularly when those involved remarried.

“God created marriage for Himself. He has a purpose for it. So, when you divorce and break up such a union, you are not only causing physical consequences here, but you are also causing damage to God and His purpose through such a marriage,” St. John said.

The pastor said the decision by pastors to divorce and remarry contradicted biblical teachings, arguing that those who divorced and subsequently married another person were committing adultery.

He described the divorce and subsequent remarriage of Jimmy as “double wahala.”

St. John said, “Those Christians, particularly pastors, who are divorcing are rebelling against God. They know God’s position and what the Bible says about divorce, but they choose to do what they want.

“When you divorce or marry a divorcee, both the person and the divorcee are committing adultery. So, when I look at Odukoya’s son (Jimmy), a pastor who divorced and married another divorcee, I just laugh. Their case is what I will call double wahala because God does not exempt anyone from His rules on divorce.

“I just smile at whatever excuses he (Odukoya) gave for divorcing and marrying another divorcee. God will not bend His rules because you are his special son or daughter. When it comes to God’s rules, it is for man to fall in or fall out.”

The Lead Pastor of Victory Life Bible Church International, Apostle Lawrence Achudume, described divorce among pastors as a foundational problem within the church, blaming it on what he called a shallow understanding of Christianity and the responsibilities of marriage.

He maintained that some people who occupied pastoral positions were more familiar with the outward expressions of Christianity than its teachings on sacrifice, commitment and responsibility.

Achudume said, “Those divorcing, particularly so-called pastors, know the church but they don’t know the word of God. They were raised in an atmosphere of music, excitement and the razzmatazz of Christianity. They don’t understand the sacrificial part of Christianity.

“Marriage is beyond the emotional talk of ‘I love you’. It is a responsibility. It is not just for sex; it is for an enduring relationship, whether in good times or bad times.”

Achudume also faulted pastors who divorced and quickly remarried, questioning the circumstances surrounding such decisions.

He said the trend raised questions about the sincerity of some relationships and the expectations people brought into marriage.

The cleric, who disclosed that he had not considered remarrying following the death of his wife, said he found it difficult to understand how some pastors could divorce and remarry within months.

He said, “Many pastors are divorcing and remarrying, which is wrong. No matter who does it, it is wrong. I lost my wife, but it is difficult for me to find another wife to marry. It has not crossed my mind to remarry because I don’t know how to go about it. Where will I start from?

“I can’t understand how somebody can divorce and remarry within one year or within six months, and marry somebody from the choir. Is it that they didn’t love the other woman before? So, it is a lot of fakeness and an unrealistic lifestyle they are living.”

Achudume urged pastors to be more transparent about the challenges in their marriages instead of presenting an unrealistic picture of perfect Christian homes to their congregations.

He said disagreements were inevitable in marriage and that church leaders should demonstrate how couples could resolve conflicts rather than pretend such problems did not exist.

“Pastors must come up and be real. You have a misunderstanding with your wife, let the church know how you resolved it. Don’t tell the church you never had a disagreement. You must have a disagreement,” he added.

Marriage counsellors blame social media

A marriage counsellor, Ibrahim Olalere, noted that divorce was becoming prevalent among religious leaders, attributing the trend to incompatibility, comparison and the influence of social media.

Olalere, who spoke with Saturday PUNCH on Thursday, said some religious leaders discovered after marriage that their spouses did not share the same level of religious commitment, a situation he identified as a key factor contributing to marital breakdown.

He said, “Divorce among religious leaders is becoming prevalent. Most religious leaders, in many cases, discover after marriage that their spouses are not as religious as they expected. This is one of the reasons some of them end up getting divorced.

“Also, bloggers who are not marriage counsellors are misleading women on social media platforms by feeding them with various orientations and expectations that are not always practicable.”

Another marriage counsellor with FamilyLife Nigeria, JeNom Makama, attributed cases of divorce among pastors partly to their failure to balance ministerial responsibilities with their marital obligations.

He said many pastors were more concerned about working for God than maintaining a relationship with Him, leaving their marriages vulnerable to neglect and temptation.

Makama said, “The reason why many pastors are divorcing today is that an average pastor focuses more on working for God rather than working with God, and in that process, that predisposes them to temptation.

“For some men of God, the lack of balance between the time they give their marriages and the time they give to the work of God is what is causing the problem. Many have forgotten that the first ministry is their marriage.

“Because of that strain, their marriages go through turbulence. If they are not careful, the wives become disgruntled and dissatisfied, and that can lead to divorce.”

He also identified the growing acceptance of divorce among Christians and differing interpretations of biblical teachings as factors contributing to the trend.

According to him, some Christians now considered unhappiness in marriage sufficient grounds for separation, while others interpreted scriptural provisions on divorce beyond adultery.

“There are Christians today who believe divorce is okay, depending on their convictions or doctrine on the Bible. There are people who believe that divorce is not only based on adultery, so you can divorce for other reasons.

“Over time, Christians have found divorce to be more acceptable than we used to in the past,” he said.

The counsellor also linked the trend to the increasing economic independence of women, noting that more women could now afford to leave unhappy marriages without depending entirely on their husbands for survival.

He, however, blamed some church leaders for worsening marital crises through what he described as unequal treatment of men and women during counselling and conflict resolution.

Makama said women were often advised to endure troubled marriages without similar efforts being made to address the conduct of their husbands.

Efforts to obtain comments from the church were unsuccessful as calls to its dedicated telephone numbers did not go through.

The phone lines were switched off when called repeatedly on Friday.

A spokesperson for the church could not also be reached as her line rang out several times.

Similarly, an email sent to the church had not been replied to as of 11pm on Friday.