Looking for light beyond the prison walls

As families across the country prepare to gather for the Festival of Lights, Puvi will spend another Deepavali away from the people she misses most.

The 32-year-old, whose name has been changed to protect her identity, has been serving a prison sentence since 2019. Being apart from her parents and her only daughter, now nine, has made the festive season especially difficult.

Even when her family makes the long journey from Perak to Kajang Women’s Prison to visit, their time together is limited to 45 minutes and physical contact is not allowed.

One memory remains particularly painful: the day her daughter asked if she could hug her mother.

Unable to embrace her, Puvi instead turned the conversation towards Deepavali preparations and what her daughter would wear for the celebration.

“People often ask about the meaning of Deepavali,” she said. “But for me, everything remains dark. I am still waiting for the light that can lead me out of this darkness.”

Puvi said she tries not to show her sadness while her parents are present, but often breaks down after they leave. The years apart have also changed how she thinks about the small gestures she once took for granted.

“In the past, I didn’t value small things, like seeking my parents’ blessings. Now, if given the chance, I would kneel at their feet and ask for forgiveness.”

With two years remaining on her sentence, Puvi hopes eventually to show her mother that the time away has changed her.

For Madhu, 45, the wait for home is considerably shorter. The single mother of five, who also has two grandchildren, has been incarcerated since 2024 after stealing money from a shop.

Before prison, she supported her family by selling nasi lemak in Puchong; now, with her release approaching, her thoughts are increasingly turning towards the traditions she hopes to resume.

One of the things she misses most is bathing her children with herbal-infused oil on Deepavali morning, a ritual she had always shared with them.

Last year, the prison’s Jalinan Kasih programme gave Madhu a rare opportunity to meet and embrace her children after months without news from them. The reunion left her in tears.

“I wept, reflecting on my own mistakes that led to me being separated from them,” she said.

During her time in prison, Madhu has taken vocational courses in hairdressing, massage and facial treatments. She hopes to use those skills after her release, with plans to open a salon and offer massage services to support her family.

“I want to prove that those in prison are capable of change, that they can apply what they have learned and return to contribute to society,” she added.

Deepavali is still marked inside Kajang Women’s Prison, where inmates of different ethnicities and nationalities help decorate their blocks with thoranai, or woven coconut-leaf decorations, and kolam designs.

Festive meals include nasi briyani and traditional sweets, bringing some familiar colour and flavour into surroundings far removed from home.

For Puvi, the celebration also carries a warning she hopes younger people will take seriously.

“Think before you act,” she said. “Don’t get so caught up in trends that you lose sight of boundaries. Once you end up here, no amount of regret can change the past.”

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