‘I’m not someone who has sex to music. I like uncomfortable silence’: Katherine Ryan’s honest playlist

The first song I fell in love with
My mother would sing and dance and cook and clean in the kitchen, as many 80s moms did, to divas like Madonna and Paula Abdul. Material Girl made me think: “This is who I want to be.”

The first single I bought
I bought three records at the same time – Jagged Little Pill by Alanis Morissette, a Sheryl Crow single and Waterfalls by TLC – from Sam the Record Man in Sarnia, Ontario, with money I’d saved up from doing chores around the house. My uncle was always trying to influence me with Canadian music, and he wasn’t wrong for doing so.

The song I do at karaoke
Probably Son of a Preacher Man. Although I think karaoke is the best way to let many people know straight away that you are an attention-seeking alcoholic, so I do try to stay away from it.

The song I inexplicably know every lyric to
Give me a wine, and somehow I know all the words to the entire score of Hamilton, even though I’ve only seen it twice. [Sings Satisfied] “I’m a girl in a world in which my only job is to marry rich. My father has no sons, so I’m the one who has to social climb for one. I’m the oldest and the wittiest and the gossip in New York City is insidious.”

The best song to play at a party
Anything early-2000s hip-hop or R&B, like Gasolina by Daddy Yankee.

The song I can no longer listen to
What I Am by Will.i.am with Sesame Street. It makes me cry because he’s giving positive affirmations to young kids about being strong and being the best version of yourself. I can’t even get through it because it makes me so sad. I start worrying that these kids need Sesame Street and Will.i.am to tell them that they’re special.

The song I secretly like, but tell everyone I hate
If I like a song, I just like it. Every Spice Girls song – I have no shame. I don’t need to be a music snob. I would crank up Wannabe any time, anywhere.

The best song to have sex to
I’m not someone who has sex to music. I like uncomfortable silence. But if I had to choose, Let Me Love You by Mario.

The song that changed my life
The Chanukah Song and Ode to My Car by Adam Sandler. I would have been about 11 or 12, and it was the first time I thought: “Oh, wait a minute. These can be funny and make music. You can make trauma a little bit funny, or at least be trauma-adjacent. You can make darker subjects funny.” I listened to his album over and over.

The song that gets me up in the morning
Currently, I’m So Happy by Ms Rachel because we have so many small children. It has a really great message. I really love what’s available for kids now.

The song that makes me cry
Water Runs Dry by Boyz II Men. I wanted to use it in The Duchess. It’s meant to be about a romantic partner, but whenever I heard it I thought of my daughter growing up. It’s about two people not communicating properly any more and wanting to get back to where they started, and I thought about that relationship changing as she got older.

The song I want played at my funeral
Thong Song by Sisqó.

Katherine Ryan has partnered with meal-subscription service Gousto. See what-the-food.co.uk for more.