Shocker: Project Runway 22 eliminated a designer without a cliffhanger! OMG!

Those of us who love original flavor Project Runway have plenty of complaints about Freeform’s version, but the one that’s the most aggravating is ending an episode right before the elimination, creating a cliffhanger where a conclusion should be. These are, after all, individual episodes, self-contained units of television.

So I practically fell off my couch when, at the end of The Devil Wears Prada 2 episode, Heidi Klum said Bobby was eliminated.

And Heidi already had me flabbergasted when she introduced the judging panel and said “Nina”—but it wasn’t Nina Garcia, of course. Instead, it was Nina Dobrev, guest judging alongside Winnie Harlow.

Tyra Banks did not judge that challenge, though she was in this episode for the end of the last challenge/fight with Law Roach. That conflict, with Law being a jerk to the guest judge and, you know, everyone, completely evaporated between episodes. They instead selected Naheim as the winner—rightfully impressed by his faux denim paper towels.

Then they revealed Elizabeth was going home, even though they were impressed by her print and, as she said, “I was the only one who made a look entirely out of paper towels.”

She almost didn’t return to the runway, and talked to a producer backstage—a producer who was wearing just a large white button-up shirt with a belt around it. Such a low budget show the producers can’t even afford pants or skirts or shorts or paper towels to wrap around thei lower halves!

Elizabeth made the classic Project Runway 22 mistake of assuming the judging is about anything other than keeping the biggest personalities around rather than being based in any kind of objective reality.

Just look at the Devil Wears Prada 2 challenge, which asked the designers to make a red carpet outfit for Heidi Klum—and then Law Roach dinged Bryan because “Heidi has boobs. Your model does not” and Bryan thus “didn’t have the client in mind when you made the dress.”

What did Law want Bryan to do, give his model a silicone breast plate? If the producers wanted the designers to be judged on how clothes fit Heidi’s body, they should have given them models with similar physiques.

Bryan won anyway—and the real shock is that Heidi actually wore the dress to the movie’s premiere. (That movie, by the way: What a mess!) All photos of Heidi there should be captioned with “You didn’t have the client in mind when you made the dress.”

What Bryan also won was HOH: the ability to nominate three designers for eviction. The producers set everyone up by this with the little Tell us which designer you think sucks more than a Dyson exercise last week. Now, one of them has the ability to get revenge! How clever!!

I wrote that this is like watching an elementary school play version of a competition reality TV show, but that’s unfair to elementary school plays that have more thoughtful structure than Project Runway.

Bryan chose Bobby, Jude, and Naheim to put on the block—even though Naheim had immunity.

Honestly, that was far less weird than Bryan suddenly talking in third person: “the chosen designers” and “the choice is being made today based on today’s look.” Did he not want to take accountability? Was he suggesting someone else made the decision for him? Was a PA standing off camera and holding up a cue card with the chosen designers? Was the choice being made today because if that choice wasn’t made the producers would Uber in a whole class of middle schoolers and have Law Roach criticize their bodies and personalities?

The results of this challenge were far less interesting than the paper towel challenge, perhaps because the designers had just one day. “I wish you had two, trust me,” Heidi told them. They also had just $700 to spend at Mood.

Jude somehow left the fabric he wanted at Mood, so he borrowed some from Bryan—who told us he wants to compete against “the best.”

That act of kindness and magnanimity was, of course, immediately undercut when Bryan said in the workroom, “[Jude] said I was the weakest but whatever.”

The funniest part of the entire episode came during a Jude interview, when he said, “So, good luck, Bryan,” and a chyron appeared: “this is shade for him.”

That’s a cheeky acknowledgment of how much shade the designers throw in interviews. Earlier, Bryan said “I’m so over this,” and that’s how I feel about the petty drama he—and Project Runway—can’t let go of. But at least they didn’t make us wait a week to see who was eliminated. Baby steps!

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