Want to secure the Jewish future? Start by helping singles find love - opinion

To my beloved Jewish community, Jewish Leaders, and to my grandchildren who have yet to be born:

We spend a lot of time talking about Jewish continuity. And we all care deeply about the future of the Jewish people, and it shows in most areas. We build Jewish schools, send our children to summer camps, invest in Israel programs, support campus organizations, and create incredible opportunities for young Jews to connect with their heritage.

We also raise millions of dollars to strengthen Jewish identity and make sure the next generation knows who they are and where they come from. And thanks to that identity, I'm writing this piece today, and I'm upset. Because in 2026 we have still left out one crucial area that is the cornerstone of the Jewish future. Marriage. More specifically, helping Jewish singles find someone to marry.

We spend years educating our children about Jewish values, traditions, and the importance of building a Jewish home. And then we hope and pray they'll grow up, find someone wonderful, get married, and pass those values along to their own children. But we are missing a key step. Hope and prayer aren't enough to make Jewish marriage happen.

I work with Jewish singles every day. I meet wonderful men and women who genuinely want to get married. They're going on dates, attending events, asking friends for introductions, and downloading dating apps they swore they'd never download again. Some are doing this for years, or worse, decades.

Meanwhile, the rest of us are busy building Jewish communities and hoping that somehow, somewhere, all these wonderful people will find each other. And unless it's us personally or our children or best friend, we don't feel the pain strongly enough. I believe we are obligated to help singles. And the Torah gives us a pretty good example of how.

In this week's parsha, Chayei Sarah, Abraham is getting older. Sarah has died, and Abraham knows that his son Isaac needs to marry and continue the family legacy. He calls on Eliezer, his trusted servant, and sends him to find a wife for Isaac. He gives him clear instructions, sends him with resources, and makes sure he understands how important this mission is.

Abraham doesn't simply tell Isaac, "Don't worry, God will send you the right person when the time is right; I'm praying, it's all good." Of course we need prayer, and also, this world is the world of action.

Abraham takes responsibility and action. He didn't wait until Isaac burnt out from dating and was desperate before helping. Abraham simply, lovingly, and methodically helped make the match.

Hands-off approach to matchmaking

When a Jewish community wants to open a school, we organize, raise money, recruit teachers, hire administrators, and develop a plan. When we want to connect young Jews to Israel, we send them there. When we identify a need in Jewish communal life, we then find a way to build something around it.

But when it comes to matchmaking, we're often surprisingly hands-off, unstructured, and disorganized.

Now imagine if we approached helping singles get married with even a fraction of the same intention and organization we bring to our other communal priorities.

We'd stop thinking that matchmaking is only for professional matchmakers. To start, you need to know single people, care about them, and be willing to make a thoughtful introduction once a month.

And when I say thoughtful, I mean thoughtful.

Invite someone single out to get a coffee and get to know them. Understand the kind of home they want to build, the values they live by, and the qualities they appreciate in another person. Then think about who you know. If you can't think of a match, get networking and talking to friends, family, and co-workers to find a match.

You don't have to know whether someone is their soulmate before suggesting they meet. You just need to make a smart match idea.

In my role as director of Jewish Continuity at World Mizrachi, I have the privilege of thinking about the Jewish future on a much larger scale on a daily basis. And the more I think about it, the more I believe that matchmaking needs to be part of our communal strategy.

So here's my challenge. What if every Jewish adult made one thoughtful introduction this month? What if every rabbi gave one sermon this year and encouraged members of the community to meet with singles, connect, and match them?

What if every Shabbat host thought about inviting a few singles who might enjoy meeting each other for one Shabbat meal? What if married couples took a few minutes once a week to sit together and think about the single friends they know and make a match suggestion? What if singles themselves set up the dates that didn't work out with one of their friends who is a better match?

When Eliezer traveled to find a wife for Isaac, he couldn't have known the full significance of the marriage he was helping arrange. He had a job to do, and he took it seriously, and generations later we are still talking about this match.

We don't know what will come from the introductions we make. Maybe nothing. Maybe a few dates.

This Shabbat, when we read parshat Chayei Sarah, I want us to take inspiration from Abraham and Eliezer. Jewish continuity matters to us, so let's put our money where our mouth is; let's help Jewish singles build Jewish homes. You never know how many generations will thank you for it.

This is how we can strengthen the Jewish future. Make one match.

And if you want to do even more than that, I have big ideas; call me.

Aleeza Ben Shalom is director of Jewish Continuity for World Mizrachi and a matchmaker and dating coach as seen in Netflix’s Jewish Matchmaking.